Dear Kellye Fox,
Please, what are you doing to your coffee?
Mushroom coffee, stevia, coffee mate creamer? Perhaps you shouldn’t be writing about coffee…!
https://parade.com/food/middle-eastern-cardamom-coffee
Oh, wait: you work for Kraft Foods. I understand: product placement, but this article should be called: Top Ways to Adulterate Your Coffee.
Perhaps if the coffee is a standard mid-dark roast of unexceptional beans, roasted the Kraft or Keurig way, adulteration is needed to make it palatable.
So here is my AI generated riposte:
Top Ways to Adulterate Your Coffee
Enhancing the simple pleasure of coffee with creative adulteration can be a delightful experiment. Here’s a playful take on how to amp up your caffeine game:
1. Spice It Up: Add a pinch of cinnamon, nutmeg, or cardamom to your coffee grounds before brewing. The warm, aromatic notes can transform your regular brew into a cozy treat.
2. Boost with Butter: Bulletproof coffee, made by adding butter and coconut oil, can provide a creamy texture and a boost of healthy fats that keep you satiated.
3. Sweetness Overload: Swap sugar with natural sweeteners like honey, maple syrup, or even a dollop of condensed milk for a richer, more decadent taste.
4. Zesty Citrus Twist: Add a bit of lemon or orange peel to your coffee. The citrus oils will give your brew a refreshing, tangy twist.
5. Nutty Delight: Stir in a spoonful of your favorite nut butter—peanut, almond, or hazelnut. This will give your coffee a creamy, nutty flavor that’s simply irresistible.
6. Spiked Joy: For those adults moments, a splash of whiskey, rum, or Baileys can turn your coffee into a
delightful pick-me-up.
7. Floral Infusion: Infuse your coffee with a hint of lavender or rose water. The floral essence adds an elegant touch to your morning routine.
8. Salted Caramel: Mix in some salted caramel syrup for a deliciously sweet and salty experience. It’s an indulgent way to start your day.
Including the weird paragraph and line breaks.
8. Salted Caramel: Mix in some salted caramel syrup for a deliciously sweet and salty experience. It’s an indulgent way to start your day.